badunk a dunk

I want to know how to dance
like really good I mean
so people are like wow he's good
even though he's so lean
I took some lessons from a guy named steve
and he tought me bout them hips
he said 'it's all about the cuban motion
but why don't we start with this:

do a little umpf
with that left hip there
then a little pow
with your foot like that
then throw back that neck
for a rockstar effect
but remember it's all
in the badunk a dunk

I don't care what they say
about the social dances
if those hips stay still
you'll lose all your chances
people walking away
because they're not interested
I'm tellin you man
put those hips in it!

do a little umpf
with that left hip there
then a little pow
with your foot like that
then throw back that neck
for a rockstar effect
but remember it's all
in the badunk a dunk

ze social dancez need class
keep ze back straight
chin in ze air
left right left right left
step forward wis ze foot
back straight chip up like zis
you've got it all so wrong
you'll neva be a good danceuir!

zis is too much work!

do a little umpf
with that left hip there
then a little pow
with your foot like that
then throw back that neck
for a rockstar effect
but remember it's all
in the badunk a dunk

really ultra innapropriate

XXXXXXXXXXXXXXXX

one by one by one

two by two by two
we write until it comes
the bulb of illumination
that acts as a conveyer belt for money
source: masses, end: home

three by three by three
we waits until they arrive
the script for the speech of life
written by the invisible hand
that writes in every language

four by four by five
I think it just arrived
the reason for the year of time
created by frankenstein
or sheldon, my dear, doctor hyde.

here we are in Africa
there we were in the west
now it is time to decide
which place we likes best
because everyone must have favorites

everyone has a home town
where they fit in the best
loved by all the community
for years of contribution
and a good sense of humor.

Working on the farm

Good morning farmer John
I'll help you out today
I don't have much to do
so I thought I'd stop by your place
could I feed the chickens?
or fix up the barn?
if you need some elbow grease
I've got a good back and two arms

Just want a day's wages
as a hard working man
toiling outside with the earth
sounds like a good plan
Take a break under a tree
then back to the rows of planting seeds
I'm telling you this is the life for me
working on the farm

I'm okay with a tractor
I know a thing or two about cows
I'm good with a weed-wacker
and I can also paint
just tell me farmer John
the work that needs to be done
I'll do it well and good
till the sun goes down

Just want a day's wages
as a hard working man
toiling outside with the earth
sounds like a good plan
Take a break under a tree
then back to the rows of planting seeds
I'm telling you this is the life for me
working on the farm

I was never an inside guy
I needed something to do
can't sit still all the time

I realized I didn't need to
since I met farmer John
He had a lot for me to do
takes a lot to run a farm

Just want a day's wages
as a hard working man
toiling outside with the earth
sounds like a good plan
Take a break under a tree
then back to the rows of planting seeds
I'm telling you this is the life for me
working on the farm

This, as well, gets no title

blinky blinky blinky I
can sort of feel my pinky
but not actually really
cuz I soaked it in a pickle jar last night

That's an old family remedy
for fixin the finger itch
that happens when you push the emergency button
the one you should never push

so now I's got the numb pinky
but I'm typing anyway
about Lord knows what
but hey hey hey hey hey hey

hey hey
hey hey hey hey
shaniqua don't live here no more

that's what they said in middle school
some still do

but I say shaka kahn
you says mouse pad
I say my day has been come and had
it's coming in the future - the day of last days.

sickle pickle nickle
on the sun's rays
just for fun plays
outlined by the defense coach
who has the pet roach
he keeps in a jar under his bed

let the rhymes lead
the story will soon follow
if no rhyme appears
then bring the story to a hault.

it's not your fault.
don't be so hard on yourself.
not all words can rhyme well! see!

orange

door hinge.
boring. inge.

tough - you see! yesyesyes you see.
I know you see because you tell me then I say rad you see.

read through once then go back again
check and see if you missed something the first time because I want this to be good for the administrator! bang pop pow crunch!
Go get me a coffee and a doughnut for my lunch! treat the system with respect.
love the paper napkin deck.
built by the crazy art man
who finishes all of his crazy plans
like using toothpicks to create san fran
then being called by the ripley's man
but turning it down cuz it's not for sail
that's what I'de do - more power to ya. brotha.

that otha guys' a sucka who lacks a toothpick model of sanfran. I would hate to be lacking in that department.

The taco truck

The taco truck man
gives me my tasty treat
some tex-mex delight
a shell full of meat
it is a wonderful cheap meal
and a quick stop as well
si quiero comer
yo se lo que debo hacer

Let's go to the taco truck
You'll like it I promise
son los mejores tacos
en este ciudad
if your'e into tex-mex
and want something real nice
follow the teal truck
for some zesty latin spice
the taco truck

no es gratis,
pero barato si
if you speak spanish
he'll give you a taco for free
if you don't know spanish
follow my lead
say "hola papi!
Tienes algo para mi?"

Let's go to the taco truck
You'll like it I promise
son los mejores tacos
en este ciudad
if your'e into tex-mex
and want something real nice
follow the teal truck
for some zesty latin spice
the taco truck

the best tacos you'll ever have
lo mejor servicio en el mundo
I would not lie about this
yo hablo en serio

Let's go to the taco truck
You'll like it I promise
son los mejores tacos
en este ciudad
if your'e into tex-mex
and want something real nice
follow the teal truck
for some zesty latin spice
the taco truck

a singy-song

this is a singy-song
everybody follow along
we'll sing in a circle all day long
and have a lot of fun
these are the words
they ain't that hard
just make some noise
like this: LALALALALA!

lalala, loo loo loo
i can sing and you better too
or i'll kick you out of my singing group!
then you'll have to find something else to do!
and man that will stink for you
cuz this band is gonna make it big
billions of people singing along
to these lovable singable singy-songs

verse number two
is different from verse one
cuz i started it different
by saying verse number two
it's easy to sing
bla-dee-la-dee-loo
give it a little stevie wonder
shoo-be-shoo-da-doo

lalala, loo loo loo
i can sing and you better too
or i'll kick you out of my singing group!
then you'll have to find something else to do!
and man that will stink for you
cuz this band is gonna make it big
billions of people singing along
to these lovable singable singy-songs

bridge time baby
to this singy-song
we want this part to be short
not too long

lalala, loo loo loo
i can sing and you better too
or i'll kick you out of my singing group!
then you'll have to find something else to do!
and man that will stink for you
cuz this band is gonna make it big
billions of people singing along
to these lovable singable singy-songs

no title for this peice

ba doo be doo be doo
i just drank witches stew
it was brown lumpy and thick
and had shavings of a brick

but i liked the way it tasted
better than mint tooth pasted
candy corns with elephant horns
and manderin blo basted

that ain't the words!
you sayin it wrong!
well humphy-doodle doo
i make up a new song

in dem four line stanzers
wit a story to foller
if de writer looses track
too bad fer dem readers

bleed speeders gneed beakers
leaked binking cheek seekers
playing with muggles and moogle boogles
playing frisky tainted bugles

ain't that the truth
yesyesyes
that's some truth to that
yesyesyes

mmm dad pickernaw
shump paw flick the paw
and pick the flaw
saw the mall
in the left side of the road.

in it. not on it. in the left side of the road.
i saw the mall in the left side of the road.
strange? eh? well, when you drive for 9 hours
slept for none - you sees things in them roads.
for shores.

motion vs. direction

February 09

i used to play word games
but now concepts trump
motion is good and well
but without direction it serves no purpose

and so A to B looks different than it used to
it's less about the road
the vehicle
the pebbles and dust
the metal and rust
barometeric pressure and all that stuff

The wrinkles will be alluded to
with a fish line through it all
to keep him on the hook
and have something to eat

But I still have doubts
as to whether the switch can be flipped
or if it takes another hand
to locate its whereabouts
then push out four stanzas
into maybe seven or thirteen
prime numbers on the mind
still ideas overlooking

Them po entertainers

one for the pop
one for the fizz
keep one sizzling
and you in show-biz
they like them fast ones
the quick left-right
always entertaining
never sleep at night

them po entertainers
makin all that money
can't go home to their honey
or forget about their fans
they're followed by white vans
and crowds of crazy people
who knew that fame
was so difficult to tame?

stay outta line
or walk on top of that line
don't fall to the right
or your behind is out the door
get a photo-shopped face
and someone else's body
you can have a new family
it's all in the contract

them po entertainers
makin all that money
can't go home to their honey
or forget about their fans
they're followed by white vans
and crowds of crazy people
who knew that fame
was so difficult to tame?

Michael Jackson knew
and Brittany Spears too
also Tom Cruise
just to name a few

them po entertainers
makin all that money
can't go home to their honey
or forget about their fans
they're followed by white vans
and crowds of crazy people
who knew that fame
was so difficult to tame?

If it ain't got love, then what does it mean?

Five thousand little things
done on the daily
brushing teeth
walking down a hall
take a seat
write an email
cook a meal
and take the dog for a walk

But if it ain't got love,
then what does it mean?
if your heart's not there
where else would it be?
only one right now
back then will come later
if it ain't got love
then what does it mean?

writing a sentence
or plucking an eyebrow
drinking some gatorade
driving a car
if you in reverse
you won't get that far
need some love gas
to burn in yo tank

But if it ain't got love,
then what does it mean?
if your heart's not there
where else would it be?
only one right now
back then will come later
if it ain't got love
then what does it mean?

means jibber-jabber gadunk
and you's a little punk
that needs a lovely person
give you a love-punch

But if it ain't got love,
then what does it mean?
if your heart's not there
where else would it be?
only one right now
back then will come later
if it ain't got love
then what does it mean?

Office parties

let the party begin
bring out the dixie cups
i got the plastic forks
we ain't holdin back!
I ordered a small pizza
we have 4 packs of oreos
let's turn this office upside-down
with a hip-hip-hooray

office parties
are the best kinds of parties
everyone dressed up
looking so nice
once a business environment
now a party environment
ain't nothin as fun
as an office party

is it someone's birthday?
If not, I don't care!
let's have a party anyway
even if it's just Monday!
That's one-seventh of our life
why not make it a party day
it's before terrific tuesday
and after super sunday

office parties
are the best kinds of parties
everyone dressed up
looking so nice
once a business environment
now a party environment
ain't nothin as fun
as an office party

i said ain't nothin as fun
as an office party
ya'll heard?
if you ain't got no office
get one,
and throw a party!

The Closet Musician

He keeps a guitar in the janitor's closet
picks it up when he gets the chance
the sound is wooden, glorious and full
as it echoes off of the closet walls

the closet musician and his melodic escape
into a world of vibrant colors
that fly
and dance
and rain from his guitar
into the air that surrounds him
the closet musician

melodies jump from his guitar to the floor
where they scurry around in circles
then chords fall all over the place
like a pile a packaging foam

the closet musician and his melodic escape
into a world of vibrant colors
that fly
and dance
and rain from his guitar
into the air that surrounds him
the closet musician

the notes travel through the boxes
under the mop and over the vacuum
painting the room with sound waves
that bounce around in the walls and never leave

the closet musician and his melodic escape
into a world of vibrant colors
that fly
and dance
and rain from his guitar
into the air that surrounds him
the closet musician

too much water for me

back to shore before the rain
a gray cloud is coming our way
everyone swim back to the boat
pick up the anchor and lets go

water
water
i don't want too much of it
I like to swim
and I like a cup of it
but when it pours from the sky
and comes at me from all sides
that's too much water for me!

everyone flops into the boat
eight of us alltogether
five in the front and two in the back
and one behind the steering wheel

water
water
i don't want too much of it
I like to swim
and I like a cup of it
but when it pours from the sky
and comes at me from all sides
that's too much water for me!

flying quickly on the boat
large beads of rain pop our backs
sheets of water unleashed from the heavens
we laugh and cry at the same time

water
water
i don't want too much of it
I like to swim
and I like a cup of it
but when it pours from the sky
and comes at me from all sides
that's too much water for me!

Wedding day

it is Paul's sister's wedding day
lets go by the lake
set up the wooden tables
order the white cake

it is a calm afternoon
the sun is mellow on the water
white chairs and a white dress
the smell of fresh air and perfume

after the ceremony we dance
old and young alike
the salsa band is swinging
everyone's arms are in the air

the next day the wedding is over
the guests return to their homes
the fathers are allowed to rest
and the mothers take a long nap

ghetto chicken shack

A pin made of planks
taken from the local factory
a window from the house
for a sleek glass ceiling
a dream mansion for chickens
living in the city
to have a spacious home
instead of a small cage

coo coo
says the hen
to her neighbors in the pin
there is the cute yellow duck
and the two turkey friends
they all live together
within city limits
partying the nights away
in their ghetto chicken shack

magazine pictures of farms
are used for wallpaper
the floor is dirt and old vegetables
and evey dinner's leftovers
they escape nearly every week
but always come back
because there is no better place to be
than their ghetto chicken shack

coo coo
says the hen
to her neighbors in the pin
there is the cute yellow duck
and the two turkey friends
they all live together
within city limits
partying the nights away
in their ghetto chicken shack

they like their pinhouse in the city
instead of an old barn
they go to the country on the weekends
and maybe they'll retire to the farm

coo coo
says the hen
to her neighbors in the pin
there is the cute yellow duck
and the two turkey friends
they all live together
within city limits
partying the nights away
in their ghetto chicken shack

losses of our cargo

I'm not sailing toward the future
I'm sailing toward the now
to keep this ship afloat
and a functional bow

Storms are difficult
but no directions are worse
backtracking and sidestepping
causes losses of our cargo

these 24 hours are important
not to set sail for tomorrow
to feel the ocean breeze currently
not dazed and haphazardly

attention McGee attention!
Keep swabbing the deck
prevention please prevention!
Don't lose all the cargo!

Storms are difficult
but no directions are worse
backtracking and sidestepping
causes losses of our cargo

Pursuit of Beauty in Sounds

A lot of pent up aggression
toward authority
because of passively obeying
when disagreements arise
I can see with my eyes
a different part of the world
pursue dreams that they rejected
even if it kills me

I'm too young for this to happen
too young not too believe
that the pursuit of beauty in sounds
will leave me unhappy
that the pursuit of beauty in sounds
will leave me unhappy

Some are driven by ideas
have passions and goals
others leave it to others
and pedal slowly uphill

I'm too young for this to happen
too young not too believe
that the pursuit of beauty in sounds
will leave me unhappy
that the pursuit of beauty in sounds
will leave me unhappy

Philosophy

If I'm in love I'll sing of love
if I'm aggressive then let it be
if my form is not posh
I'm not going to change it
embrace the current sign
but don't get any splinters
then move right along
leave behind the frozen philosopher

Philosophy has its ends
one of which is prevention
of traveling and adventure
because why should we do that?

I'll tell you why
I've thought about it long and hard
stillness causes corrosion
one must walk every day

Philosophy has its ends
one of which is prevention
of traveling and adventure
because why should we do that?

zoom Zoom

This is what it means to be a man
have a 401K and retirement plan
play golf with your buddies on the weekend
and drive a fancy car

zoom zoom
drive a fast car
zoom zoom
drive a black car
zoom zoom
drive a sports car
zoom zoom
drive drive

freedom is not what you think it is
so forget those hippie ideas
love the room we put you in
and work within what you've been given

zoom zoom
drive a fast car
zoom zoom
drive a black car
zoom zoom
drive a sports car
zoom zoom
drive drive

Earn your manhood

These are long bleeping days
in this boring bleeping office
I need a better bleeping attitude
or I'll drive myself crazy

keep striving toward the best
you'll love it when you get there
you don't know what you've missed
stay in the office
you'll adjust to be happy
it's for the greater good
sacrifice that energy
and earn your manhood.

balance blessings and requests
reflection and improvements
nostalgia and ambition
we need a bit of each

keep striving toward the best
you'll love it when you get there
you don't know what you've missed
stay in the office
you'll adjust to be happy
it's for the greater good
sacrifice that energy
and earn your manhood.

the body of Hercules

Pumping fists up and down
loud hisses and grunts
big brights smiling teeth
to greet you at the front door
membership is cheap here
we will give you the body you need
to take your boss' job and please your wife
fifty dollars a month and you'll be happy

stretching, running, lifting
lose a few pounds a day
feel the happy coming in
and the fat burning away
all my veins are popping out
but i like it that way
i have the body of Hercules
huge bicepts and a two inch waist

I eat enough greens to plant a garden
and always drink powder with my milk
weak people are afraid of me
because of this body I've built
I could fly if I wanted to in fact I may try
my workout program is for the gods
I'm so strong I will never die

stretching, running, lifting
lose a few pounds a day
feel the happy coming in
and the fat burning away
all my veins are popping out
but i like it that way
i have the body of Hercules
huge bicepts and a two inch waste

They gym is my sanctuary
taking me to heigher heights
climb the stairmaster to heaven
ride to olympus on a bike

stretching, running, lifting
lose a few pounds a day
feel the happy coming in
and the fat burning away
all my veins are popping out
but i like it that way
i have the body of Hercules
huge bicepts and a two inch waste

night

The slow pickup truck
winds down a curvy road
to escape the sun at daybreak
he would go faster
but the gas tank is empty
all he can do is coast

coasting along
trying to stay out of the light
in the safety of night

a dead end confronts him
there is nowhere to go
he turns around and greets the sun
the ultraviolet rays start to chip his paint
he won't last much longer

coasting along
trying to stay out of the light
in the safety of the night

the court jester and the princess

The king is back in town today
the festival will begin
the princess must find a suitor
I hope that I'll be him!
I flossed my teeth and shined my shoes
I put on my dancing legs
my bright colors and jester scepter
will surely do the trick

Could the court jester
win the heart of a princess
by juggling seven doves
then watching them fly away?
cartwheels and singing
to impress the young maiden
i'm just a fiddling fool
but what's wrong with that?

men prepare their swords
to duel for the prize
of winning the king's throne
and the princess' eyes
but the sport turns bloody
and the festival goes awry
I thought these men were chivalrous
yet they broke out into a fight

Could the court jester
win the heart of a princess
by juggling seven doves
then watching them fly away?
cartwheels and singing
to impress the young maiden
i'm just a fiddling fool
but what's wrong with that?

The princess approaches me
with a foul look on her face
"these men are all baboons
they should be disgraced"
i agree and laugh
she looks at me and smiles
but then she leaves and never comes back
what luck is that!

Could the court jester
win the heart of a princess
by juggling seven doves
then watching them fly away?
cartwheels and singing
to impress the young maiden
i'm just a fiddling fool
but what's wrong with that?

ode to magnolia woods

rocking slowly back and forth
in an old wooden chair
hummingbirds flutter a few feet away
singing their song to greet the day

bright green grass and oak leaves
are a blanket to the soft hill
magnolia trees and berry bushes
sprinkled across the field

the natural colors and scents
blend together thickly in the air
seducing all of my senses
as I sleep for a thousand years